Hairy Back, Leaf-Eating, Sword Toting Spider

Hey, everyone. Sometimes you get a special treat when you live in the woods. For example, I just encountered an odd spider. I wanted to think up a cool name for him but I couldn't think of one. I will call him a hairy backed, leaf eating, sword toting spider. Can you make out the sword design on his back? I suspect that :1) His mom was a Japanese beetle and his dad was a granddaddy longlegs. As such, he grew up with a ninja, anime fetish and had a tattoo put on his back of a sword, to intimidate his enemies. Or 2) There is a legend that whosoever finds the sword on a spider's back and has the strength to lift it, will become the King of Camelot. Perhaps some red neck Merlin has instigated this. 3) This spider has been peeking in the windows and watching me play innumerable games like Prince Of Persia, Warrior Within, Backstab and Hero Of Sparta 2. The spider got so into it that he developed a mutation on his back. He is now a swashbuckler and is intent on rallying all spiders on the mountain to drive the interloping humans into the sea. (Which is a long way from here.)4) The dude eats leaves because he is the oddest of spiders. He is a vegetarian. When he ceased to eat bugs he was sent into exile and now lives a solitary life. A curse was placed on him by the other spiders, in which he must wander the wasteland. Every spider he meets will see the sword and seek to kill him. This is sort of the Jeremiah Johnson of bugs. In that movie a guy lived in the mountains and every Crow Indian sought him out, one at a time, to kill him. A great movie starring Robert Redford. I suppose I could name the big spider Jeremiah or Robert or Redford. That's it, the Redford spider.

Well, hey, if I can think of something a bit less silly to write about, I may put out another post today. From the webbed retreat, I'm CE Wills.

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