Gifts For Super heroes

Hey, everyone. It being Christmas, I thought you might have a few Super-Heroes on your list. As a full service blog, I thought I'd share some of the things I have bought for my super-friends.
1) Spiderman- Anything. The guy has no luck at all.
2) Submariner- Deodorant. He smells like fish.
3) Superman- Kryptonite antidote.
4) Green Lantern- A matching green bracelet for that cool ring.
5) Iron Man- Pepper Potts, wrapped in a red ribbon. Just a red ribbon.
6) Batman- A dehumidifier for that drafty old Bat-cave.
7) Hulk- Clothes are always good. The dude is hard on clothes.
8) Flash- Shoes, obviously. Yellow Reeboks with wings on them. How is it that he doesn't have a shoe deal with Nike or someone?
9) Wonder Woman- Victoria's Secret, of course. I'd need her there with me to try on the stuff.
10) Black Widow- A whip, to go with all that black leather.
11) Thor- A new name. So he wouldn't sound like a muscle condition with a speech impediment.
12) Catwoman- Cream will do.
13) Mystique- She doesn't need a single, solitary thing. Wow. I envy Magneto.
14) Loki- New headgear. The horns leave a bad first impression. Can you imagine picking up your date for the prom, meeting the parents? They'd think you were evil, or something.
15) Doctor Octopus- Cooler shades.
16) Popeye the sailor man- A less skinny girlfriend... or spinach will do in a pinch. How about a can opener?
17) Porky Pig- Some sort of underpants, please. His pink butt is nauseating.
18) Odin- Energy drinks. The Odin sleep has to be a drag.
19) Volstag- Spa membership.
20) Storm- How about a ground fault protection strip for plug-ins? Or a raincoat? Umbrella? Wolverine?
From the author's green retreat, I'm CE Wills. Merry Christmas to all.

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