Skip to main content

Shooting Piranhas In the Sewer

      Hey, everyone. I have been playing an excellent game yesterday and today. It is called Apocalypse Max and it is one of the good ones. I got it for free, although it is normally $2.99. It has been so much fun that I felt compelled to buy an in-app, just so I wouldn't feel like I was cheating them or freeloading. Even the in-apps are done more fairly than most because you don't really need to spend money to make progress. Rare, in today's app store.
     This game is a side scroller, though not an endless runner. Basically you can stand still when you want to catch your animated breath. At other times you advance, mostly to the right, shooting apocalyptic creatures with a bad attitude. There are sections in which you are in the swamps and sewers, as well as other places which I haven't conquered yet.
    If you come across some crates, swipe on the screen and smash them open. Most of the time there will be cool stuff like ammo or med kits in them. You certainly use a lot of ammo, because this damaged, future world is a scary place. Nobody really likes you either.
   I love the diversity of the enemies in this game. That keeps it fresh. There are piranha fish that jump from the water and bite the dickens out of you. You can hear their teeth clatter together. Voracious rascals. Shooting them on the fly is sweet. How did those things get in the sewers, anyway? Also of interest are vultures that fly over you and drop exploding eggs. No, I am not joking. (Do you think this is really sanitary?) Sometimes you have to hit your 'jump' button and then shoot the feathered dudes, due to the angle of fire.
     Then there are the crabs. Not the kind that lie in wait in public restrooms. No, these are big suckers and you can hear the clicking of their claws on the pavement. But, the main menace is all the species of zombies.
       There are regular zombies, two bullets will kill them. Zombies with ball caps take 4 bullets. Huge zombies in a butcher's apron take about 8 shells, I think. Then there are those that have the temerity to throw meat cleavers at you. Can you imagine those cheeky devils doing that?
     Hey, it's not like you're a pilgrim in this dying land. No, you can upgrade weapons with gold earned by your in-game exploits. At current, I have a pistol with infrared sights, an automatic rifle and two machine pistols that will chew up some undead Freds in a hurry. I try to conserve ammo, but when I run out for one weapon, I switch to another gun that has bullets. One more thing, if you swipe the screen while standing close to a zombie, you cut that bad boy in half. Barbaric, I know, but he came hunting trouble and found it in abundance.
    I forgot to mention that I was also in The Dead Forest and I see on my map that the next spot is Spooksville. Which reminds me, the music for the game is a cool mood-setter because it sounds like something from The Addams Family. Pity that the lovely Morticia can't be in the game. How did she take such small steps?
     Hey, I just received a warning from the game that there may be toxic gases leaking out of pipes. Just like a real sewer. At least there are no foul smells in this sewer. If you want that, you will have to supply your own.
     I hope all the readers in Canada are okay, after the earthquakes, and best wishes to everyone in the path of the wrathful Sandy. Here at the author's green retreat, it is 46 degrees with a 25 MPH wind and a bit of rain. It is not a great night for sitting on the porch, so I plan to kill a few zombies.
     Hey, Falcons, great job on the win today and the 7-0 record. Fear the Birds...
    I'm CE Wills.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The White Chicken Mystery

    The other night I happened to come home very late. It was the middle of the night and I was driving up a steep mountain road. Near the top I saw something white in my headlights. It was standing in the other lane, standing very still. It was a large white chicken. It was probably a rooster because I thought I could see his comb as I whizzed by at my customary pace. He never moved a muscle. This is weird, don't you think?      After a couple of days to consider this phenomenon, I have come up with some plausible answers for his bizarre behavior. 1. He was conflicted whether or not he should cross the road. 2. He was feeling cocky and decided to play chicken with the traffic. 3.He was being hen-pecked at home and had decided to end it all. 4. Someone had egged him on to do it. 5. He had just watched the movie Fantastic Four and decided to try to stop a truck the way that Ben Grimm did on the bridge. 6. He had driven himself crazy wondering if ...

Batman Lives In Washington, DC

    Hey, everyone. I just read an interesting article on Washington Post.Com by Mike Rosenwald. It was titled Who Is the Route 29 Batman? This is a true story about a guy that the cops pulled over. The guy was driving a black Lamborghini with Batman plates. There were yellow Batman symbols on the doors. They had a video from the police car that showed him being pulled over. He was wearing a Bat-suit which he said cost him $5000. His gig is that he visits sick children in area hospitals and hands out Bat-Toys and Bat-books to cheer the kids up.     His name is Lenny B. Robinson and he says that the 'B' stands for Batman. He is perfectly sane and is just a good dude trying to make a difference. He is a self-made millionaire and is currently having a duplicate of the Batmobile custom-made at a cost of $250,000.    It was a hoot, watching the cops having their pictures made with the Bat Guy. Someone asked him where Robin was and he said that the boy won...

Cake Is Better Than Swords

Hey, everyone. On Thanksgiving, we had a get-together here at The Author's Green Retreat. One lady brought a cake which I wanted to show you. It had the look of a Roman Coliseum about it. Inside it was just as decadent...and fun, as ancient Rome. When I cut it open, homemade marshmallow cream began to ooze out in several spots, running over the chocolate cake and peanut butter icing. It is best served warm so the cream is fluid. Very tasty. The same lady, and her children, are people who have played a lot of Skyrim. They gave me some pointers on the game because I am having problems with it. They taught me how to fast travel, and a ton of other things, but the main thing was the armor and clothing problem. This is a little embarrassing, but let me explain. Okay. For several weeks when I played, I would enter towns and everyone I met would comment on my nakedness. I would select a tunic and shoes, whatever, go back around people and they would say something about it. I guess I w...