The Force Is Strong In These Piggies

     Hey, everyone. Yesterday I bought a good game about those angry avians. The title is Angry Birds: Star Wars and it is easily the best Angry Birds yet. I estimate that it is a 4.5 stars out of 5. I bought the cheaper version for I-Phone but it plays just fine on my I-Pad 3. Moreover, the I-Phone version is a sweet 99 cents. There are 120 levels of pig-bashing fun on Tatooine. After that you can play the Death Star grouping, which is locked pending your 'making bacon' on the first world. The ice planet, Hoth, is a free update, coming soon. Path of the Jedi (Luke Bird's Jedi Training) allows you to play one level, then sends you to the old app store to "forge your light saber". What that entails is paying $1.99 for 40 levels on Dagobah, which I totally did, because I like nothing better than carving piggies with my @#!*** light-saber, okay?
     Also, bonus levels are awarded in an as-yet undiscovered process. This game is cheap, fun and available. That is three basic things about many of life's endeavors.
      Your birds are a colorful lot. There is the Han Solo bird. He has brown hair and shoots a laser rifle at the pigsters. He is the best guy to have around in a fight, just like the movies. The Luke bird has a wealth of golden hair and if you tap him at the right time, he swings a light saber and carves through walls, or pigs, for that matter. The Obi-Wan bird has a monastic brown robe and if you tap the screen he will exert the force on pigs or walls. I find him to be more of a spiritual bird, like the Zen prophet with feathers.
      C-3PO is funny because if you tap on him after he is flung toward the pigs, he goes to pieces and the pieces inflict a little damage on the curly-tailed foemen. His sidekick, R2D2, shoots electricity at the enemy.
    Before I forget, if the pigs are firing laser cannon from their fortifications and they strike your warriors, they will totally negate their attack. Don't say I didn't warn you. Also, I saw a golden egg, hidden beneath a cliff wall on Tatooine, but I forgot which level.
     I like the music, I like the sound effects. I like the light saber because, hey, I always wanted one. If they ever produce one that actually works I will be standing in that line. If you hated all the other Birds games, buy this one.
     I'm CE Wills, pig killer extraordinaire, and may the force be with y'all.

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Shadowgun: Crushing The Driller On Level 4

Hey, everyone. Let's talk about the game called Shadowgun, the I-Pad game with which I have a love-hate relationship. Most of you who made it past the evil Cyber Lobster are doubtless locked in a death struggle with the Driller at the end of level 4. At this point you have been in the cave for a long time. The Driller breaks through the rock wall and chases you through the tunnel as you try to shoot out the green lights which slows the Driller down. If you are slick enough to shoot out all the lights and emerge from the cave, a rolling door crashes on the Driller and crushes his aggravating carcass. I have tried and failed to beat the Driller at least 250 times. I hate the Driller to the heights and depths my soul can reach. I hate it like a plague. I hate it with intensity of feeling. I hate it like a rich man hates taxes. Excuse me, I got carried away. We had a big dinner here at the green retreat and my friend Trevor was ...

You're Aiming the Missile Where?

Hey, everyone, out there in game-land. The number 1 game on the friendly neighborhood app store is Call of Duty: Strike Team . No wonder, because it is a terrific game. The farther I play, the cooler it gets. But before I get to that, what are all these numbers indicating on my gun? Has to be some sort of ammo indicator for the clips, I guess. either that or some of my compadres has trouble doing his math homework. Whatever. Hey. Check out the picture of me hitching a ride on an enemy truck so that my team can infiltrate a missile silo. Do you like the face mask? I bought it at a store called Fashions by Bane. Ha, ha. (Batman Reference) On this mission, my team was assisted by a Russian Spetsnaz squad. How's that for detente, comrade? These Spetsnaz guys make everything fun. What I mean is this. We shoot bunches of enemies and get into the bowels of the silo. We get to the gantry where the missile is (Pictured above) and we see that the rad...

Shadowgun: Killing The Windbreaker

Hey, everyone. I thought it might be a good time for a bit of an update on the riveting game called Shadowgun. Consider this your spoiler alert and tune out if you want to. Once you get past the dreaded Driller, things get better but you are certainly not out of the woods. You will want to make sure you keep a full clip in your gun as you stroll through the realm of the evil and crazy Dr. Simon. But hey, you're John Slade, the Shadowgun, and wherever you set your foot is the place to which your authority extends. I love the way that some of the barriers disintegrate under the impact of bullets. I didn't learn this at my mother's knee but I darn sure know it now. I have learned that there are certain places it is good to plan on using the rocket launcher. Keep your stock of those filled. There are these transporter guys who are aggressive punks. The only way they respect you is if you kill them, so that's the way I roll. As...

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