Skip to main content

Bradless

   Hey, everyone. I usually procrastinate about buying Carley's Christmas stuff. On such occasions I go to the mall and find that everything is picked over and depleted or out of stock. Today I did better and was out on the front lines. I love seeing all the women who watch guys shop for their wives. They consider us clueless and clumsy about women's stuff. I walked past a check out stand and a bunch of ladies were laughing about a clerk's story of an incident. One of the women said, "That had to be a man, right?" All these ladies were laughing their butts off. Always good to bring joy to women in whatever capacity possible. Ha, ha.
      Moving on, I selected a tasteful bunch of stuff for Carley and went to check out. The clerk said that the computer wouldn't accept my card as a 'credit', so I should type in my pin number. Now, I am one of those guys who does not know his pin number. If I stored useless information of this sort, I would have no room in my mind for the Falcons' record and stats, mental pictures of Angelina Jolie in black lingerie and a myriad of other vital things. So, I had to dig in my wallet and get my cash out. I have always carried a lot of cash because I don't feel confident in cards. Having grown up dirt poor, I am embarrassed easily by little things like having my card rejected.
      Mission accomplished, I leave the store and know that my Christmas shopping is done. Now, however, the scenario is changed. Here I was, all dressed up and no where to go. My plan had been to go to Logan's Roadhouse and eat massive quantities of steak, ribs, Parmesan wings, baked potato (loaded) and a huge salad. Oops, I forgot the fresh rolls. But now, I don't trust my card and I only have enough cash left for a value meal at McDonald's. Worse than that, I can't go to the movies. I had planned on seeing Brad Pitt's new flick, in which he plays a hit man for the mob. Did I get to go see it? Noooooooooo.
     As I was driving home, my wife called me from work. I told her about this burden, which I was managing to bear up under, and she laughed at me.
"You're so silly, baby. That stuff happens all the time. Your card would have worked at the restaurant, or the theater. Besides you could have gone to a bank, an ATM or done a number of other things, like cash a check, for instance."
 "Yes, I know," I said evenly. "But I am a writer and we live in a fantasy world. We try to limit our interaction with reality, lest it hinder our craft."
    She laughed and hung up on me. I have now returned home, Bradless, broke, (cash-wise) and hungry. I think I will buy a bunch of songs on I-Tunes, drink some beer and then play sad country songs on my keyboard until she gets home. Maybe she will bring me some food?
     From the author's green retreat, I'm CE Wills.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Four Free Games

     Hey, everyone. If free games makes the start of a new week a little better, we're in luck. Check these out on your friendly, neighborhood app store. 1) Cowboys vs. Aliens vs. Ninjas- This is a dual stick shooter, much like Mini-Gore . You are an old-west cowboy with a vast array of weapons (earned gradually). You have to move and shoot, avoiding death, as you battle Ninjas and aliens. Some aliens are quite large. Some enemies are big Sumo Wrestlers. There are sword-wielding ninjas and these aliens that yield a mini-nuclear explosion when killed. When your enemies die they leave behind little stacks of money, or skulls. You collect these items because of a strange hobby of trophy grabbing for your macabre collection. Just kidding, the items can be spent or used as the game progresses. This is a good game and I played it for a while last night. 2) The Heist - A puzzle game with a twist. As you try to open a bank vault, you must face a series of different puz...
Post a Comment
Read more

Game Review: NFS, Hot Pursuit

    This game was one which I refused to download for a while, even though it was on sale for 99 cents. I thought that it looked boring and narrow. Boy, was I wrong! This game totally kicks butt. It is one of those rare games that will actually give you an adrenaline rush. It is that intense. The developers, EA Games, have recently updated the app to include two main avenues of play. You can either be the cops or the racers who are trying to evade the cops. As a racer you have to deal with cops trying to hit you and make you crash, cops buzzing you with helicopters, oncoming traffic, tack strips spread across the road and roadblocks. In the cop mode you are a cop and you are trying to stop a reckless racer by any means, fair or foul. As a racer you can use nitrous oxide for increased speed, overdrive capability and oil slicks. You also can jam the cops communication with a jamming unit. Like almost all games these days, it gets harder as you go along. I prefer my games to...
Post a Comment
Read more

Shadowgun: Killing The Windbreaker

    Hey, everyone. I thought it might be a good time for a bit of an update on the riveting game called Shadowgun. Consider this your spoiler alert and tune out if you want to.     Once you get past the dreaded Driller, things get better but you are certainly not out of the woods. You will want to make sure you keep a full clip in your gun as you stroll through the realm of the evil and crazy Dr. Simon. But hey, you're John Slade, the Shadowgun, and wherever you set your foot is the place to which your authority extends.      I love the way that some of the barriers disintegrate under the impact of bullets. I didn't learn this at my mother's knee but I darn sure know it now. I have learned that there are certain places it is good to plan on using the rocket launcher. Keep your stock of those filled. There are these transporter guys who are aggressive punks. The only way they respect you is if you kill them, so that's the way I roll. As...
3 comments
Read more