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The White Chicken Mystery

    The other night I happened to come home very late. It was the middle of the night and I was driving up a steep mountain road. Near the top I saw something white in my headlights. It was standing in the other lane, standing very still. It was a large white chicken. It was probably a rooster because I thought I could see his comb as I whizzed by at my customary pace. He never moved a muscle. This is weird, don't you think?
     After a couple of days to consider this phenomenon, I have come up with some plausible answers for his bizarre behavior.
1. He was conflicted whether or not he should cross the road.
2. He was feeling cocky and decided to play chicken with the traffic.
3.He was being hen-pecked at home and had decided to end it all.
4. Someone had egged him on to do it.
5. He had just watched the movie Fantastic Four and decided to try to stop a truck the way that Ben Grimm did on the bridge.
6. He had driven himself crazy wondering if he had come first, or the darn egg had.
7. He was a detective, trying to find out where all the darn eggs were going. Could they really trust those humans up at the big, white house?
8. He had just peeked through the window of a house and seen someone playing Chictionary and just couldn't deal with it.
9. In a few hours he was to participate in an important cock-fight. He was either looking for a priest or was calling "Yo, Adrian!"
10. His feelings were hurt because some chick had accused him of having a comb-over.
     On the same trip home I drove by a church, out in the boondocks. There was a car in the parking lot with lights on and engine running. The driver, a female, was holding a flashlight under her chin. I suspect she may be a future contestant on the game show Baggage. The truth is, there are always interesting things to see, if you are observant. From the author's green retreat. I'm CE Wills.

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