Things You Should Know About This Picture

Hey, everyone. Someone asked me the other day if I would upload a picture of myself. So, dutifully, I looked up my most recent photo and uploaded it. However, I feel that I should give you a few pertinent facts about this picture.
1. This is a black and white, which indicates it was probably taken during the 50's.
2. This was the last time I smiled.
3. Since this was taken I have learned a new language. English.
4. My abs look about the same as they did then, thanks to my exhaustive regimen of beer, pizza and playing video games.
5. I don't play with my toes anymore.
6. I am still devoted to one woman; it's just a different woman.
7. My hair style is similar now to what it was then. The amount of hair available is similar.
8. I have a few more teeth.
9. My knowledge level has increased but has also subsequently decreased since this picture was taken.

From the author's green retreat, I'm CE Wills.

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The Biscuit

Hey, everyone. What a relief that Christmas is over, huh? I don't think it was meant to be the way it is. I started thinking about the so-called good 'ole days today. My wife says that at her house, they would take a left-over biscuit and shine their shoes before church. I one-upped her by saying, "Oh, yeah? I ate the biscuit when everyone got finished with it. And I was grateful for it." Truly, though, you can and people did, shine their shoes with a biscuit. Hey, they were greasy little buggers. Speaking of greasy little buggers, I remember when everyone had wells and were very conservative about water, particularly those of us who had to crank a handle up and down to get a bucket of water. There was no daily bath. (No showers in those days, mate.) About twice a week we took a bath and here's the recipe: The oldest kid took a bath first, then the next oldest etc. You can see why younger siblings hated the older. Bathing in the...

Cake Is Better Than Swords

Hey, everyone. On Thanksgiving, we had a get-together here at The Author's Green Retreat. One lady brought a cake which I wanted to show you. It had the look of a Roman Coliseum about it. Inside it was just as decadent...and fun, as ancient Rome. When I cut it open, homemade marshmallow cream began to ooze out in several spots, running over the chocolate cake and peanut butter icing. It is best served warm so the cream is fluid. Very tasty. The same lady, and her children, are people who have played a lot of Skyrim. They gave me some pointers on the game because I am having problems with it. They taught me how to fast travel, and a ton of other things, but the main thing was the armor and clothing problem. This is a little embarrassing, but let me explain. Okay. For several weeks when I played, I would enter towns and everyone I met would comment on my nakedness. I would select a tunic and shoes, whatever, go back around people and they would say something about it. I guess I w...

Fishdom,the Smart Cover and the Natural Blond

Hey, everyone. I have played several different games lately. Mighty Mouse has gone 'free' and I've played it a little. It's okay. You fly through the air and punch bad guys, mines dropped by Oil Can Harry's plane, and try to avoid hitting anything unless you are pushing a button that gives you super speed. There are a lot of levels but they get harder, fast, and that takes some of the fun away. Still, for free, I can't complain. Also, Polly Purebred is fairly attractive, for a mouse. I wonder if she is a natural blond? Only her hairdresser knows for sure. Fishdom Harvest HD is an older game that we've had for a while. This is a fun, relaxing game that has you swapping tiles so that you can complete levels and advance. As this happens, you earn in-game cash and decorate your fish tank with fish, plants and equipment. I like it a lot. I understand that Shadowgun is now coming out with a version that is o...

CE Wills

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